This is commentary I just posted in response to a (female) friend's misunderstanding about the differences between male and female sexuality. I'm reposting it here.

Sorry- but it is you (and all women) who are clueless. The male body physiology RELENTLESSLY builds up semen. The body- all by itself- will release this build-up- at night- in a "wet dream" if said male isn't moving it on a regular basis. For men- achieving an orgasm and releasing this build-up- relaxes them. It refreshes them. It makes them feel alive. When semen has built up to the point it needs to be released- it literally takes over. Said man has to deal with it- because it has the power/energy to distract him. If a man is frustrated about ANYTHING- having an orgasm will assist in releasing frustration. This is an epic aid in going to sleep- as it pulls you out of the "mind" and into the body for a body release- and then it's a lot easier to get to sleep. prom wears for busty women

None of this has anything to do with ROMANCE- or sex "as a loving and beautiful thing". It's about said male remaining in balance because the energy build-up has been released in an ongoing and timely manner. And I've known men who could orgasm twice a day. At least. So if you're not interested in your man's twice-a-day need for release- then you need to own that. And stop trying to own your man.

So me? I'm sick of the heterosexist model- where the male's sexual interest is in an outer other- and therefore his sexual focus is on you women- who only want sex to be a loving and beautiful thing where you are romanced (bought gifts- sent flowers- taken to dinner- given cars and furs- because HE went to Jareds) (really- when are you going to go to Jareds?) (so you can have procreational sex until you've had your 3 children) (only to then say- I'm done with sex) when all the man wants to do is get off so he can go to sleep.

You call it a base gratification. Your friend calls it cheap. IT'S YOU WHO DOESN'T GET IT. AND YOU WHO WILL LOSE OUT- when you finally figure out just how many of your "straight" men are actually bi-sexual. And you'll find that out when they stop having any sexual interest in you- because you can't let it be just a necessary ongoing relentless buildup release- that you're happy to participate in- because you know just how effectively it makes your man not want to go to war and kill everyone.

Religions have been trying to repress this energy forever- because women get pregnant. In an age of birth control- pregnancy is not the same issue it used to be. Of course- religions hate this- so their propaganda remains abstinence. Sex- for men- simply isn't the same as it is for women. And sex starts the first time a male masturbates (WITHOUT YOU EVER HAVING EVEN COME INTO THE PICTURE) and ends with his dying breath. And you women don't even understand it so how could you possible think you get to control it.

The current mess also has to do with sexual harassment from powerful men- because their power allowed them to get away with what they've been getting away with for 10,000 years. How is it that it took to 2017 for y'all to stand up? But- as we all have heard- boys will be boys. So you're going to have to start there if you want to change the paradigm. And please note- most boys were raised by their MOTHERS- so some blame will rest there.

We men- who have sex with men- have RECREATIONAL SEX- not procreational sex. We don't have to buy each other shit and romance each other- because we're perfectly happy just moving the energy build-up. And when your "straight men" finally figure that out- you're going to have a much more difficult time finding a husband- who will romance you.

Your JUDGMENT that men's sexuality is base- is just that. A judgment. And it's dead wrong.